The mask

There was a time when I hated liars. Now I’m one of them. All of a sudden there is this exponential rise in the no of lies that I say to the nearest of the near ones that I have. There are times when there was no possible reason to tell a lie and the truth itself would have sufficed but still I took the dishonest path.

                 After all this lying around what I have realized is that the society is bound together on these thin string of lies. What would happen if all of a sudden we all were deprived of this super-power of lying? For everything people asked, you would be bound to give the truthfull response. You go to a friends party and be honest about how it sucks. When your dear one tries to impress you with her all new recipe you can’t be honest about how you mom is the best cook in the world and no matter how much she tries she can never beat her.  You would burp out how your professor is a moron right in front of him. You would honestly tell your boss that he is an asshole and your colleague that he is the biggest idiot that you have ever seen. There would be a nuclear apocalypse within weeks if nations became such honest.

The most important aspect of this lying is that after all this lying, and when you have to second it with another lie only to think of a third one to cover them all up, is that slowly you program you mind in believing in all these made up stuff. This helps because if you believe the stuff to be true then you no longer need to worry about your facial expressions or cover stories as everything becomes natural.

                Today I lie so easily to my parents to my teachers to everyone around me all so easily because of this program that is continuously running in my mind. And all of a sudden everyone is happy. People say that the greatest invention of mankind is probably fire or the wheel but I would say that the greatest invention of mankind is the art of lying.

                It’s not that I've not been in the receiving end of all this lying. False information is fed to us at every step of our lives. That yoghurt that they claim to be fat free is full of fat, the magical effects of cosmetics and homoeopathy is a myth, maybe actually the moon landings are all made up, or the country is run by some secret organization, and 9-11 was planned and Osama isn't actually dead. Who know the truth? I mean WikiLeaks is blowing up facts every now and then.

                So when I had to feed this idea into your mind (yes I'm talking to you) I did it through the art of lying and no matter how much I try I know that this idea that I have planted in your mind is so firmly embedded that it has got nowhere to go. And remember that I want this idea to be there, all that I want is for you to understand that now that everything is how they are supposed to be, the truth is that I'm the same guy that you knew in the first place and this new me, well it isn't me, It’s just a made up person to make you believe in all those lies and that person isn't me.

There is an Idiot in all of us............

So she comes up to me and says do you know what day it is today,and I was like Friday??. After judging from her expression I asked, "Why?, is there something special about today?". We men are so bad with dates. I mean women remember the tiny details of everything,the day we first met, what color dress we were wearing, the day we first went out, the first time we were drenched under the monsoon,etc etc. For us men,well we might even forget her birthday. After repeated questioning and a bit of emotional blackmail, She said "Today is the day a year ago you made me cry". A wicked silence followed.
         Suddenly I remembered it all. She used to be one of the best-est friends of mine. We shared stuff made promises to be best friends for ever, but all that changed that night. Today I stand in front of her and I would know a stranger better than her. All it took was a single stupid act of mine. Some times even if you know the other person very well it becomes difficult to judge the breaking point of the same. Everybody has it, but more importantly everybody has a weak point, where even the slightest of touches will make it bleed. And I had stabbed a dagger onto it. Boy did she cry, and all you could do is stand in front of her and watch. Coz you know no consolation will stop this tide as you actions has unleashed it in the first place. But right at that moment you realize what a huge mistake you have made, and I did, I accused her of something which even I knew was never possible, but I did,out of ignorance, out of idiocracy. Even today I stood speechless,without any explanation, when she asked, "Did you really mean it?Do you realize what went through me that day?". I did realize, but us men, for us it is so difficult to express of feelings in the right manner, women don't understand that. They think that we are not capable of sharing someones emotions but we do, and yes we do feel. Our faces might not show but only our hearts know what goes on inside of us. There is few greater pain in the world than to watch someone you care about cry for an act of yours. I knew that I had hurt her for that one stupid act of mine,but it was only now that I realized that lost her for it. All these days,a complete year I had wondered what could have possibly went wrong. Well now I know it. Its not like we did not talk after that incident. Yes we did, but it was all downhill from that point on. "You don't even remember", she said and walked away.
          That night she was online and I text-ed,"wishing you a unhappy "I was an idiot and I made you cry" anniversary, wish to remember it next year.......  : p".
                       "LOLz......Wish you do.........You never gave me that treat you promised", is what she replied after half an hour.
             Don't know if this is the conclusion of it or a fresh start,but whatever it is it is definitely intriguing,All of a sudden you start dreaming,you wish things were better again..........
Now I sit in my room and listen to hoobastank play

I'm sorry that I hurt you


It's something I must live with everyday


And all the pain I put you through


I wish that I could take it all away


And be the one who catches all your tears


Thats why i need you to hear


I've found a reason for me


To change who I used to be


A reason to start over new


and the reason is You

Hate is heavy word

Recently one of my closed friends attacked me over some matter of being a muslim and occupying "their" land India. I was shocked to see such anti-Muslim sentiments among such educated college students. But why such hatred? Who are these anti-Muslim people?




There are many Indians, especially Hindus, who feel there is something wrong with Muslims. These negative sentiments come in different gradations- from mere dislike or contempt to downright hatred. 

How are these feelings expressed? Say, you tell someone that you have a Muslim roommate. The reaction is- “Really? How come? Did you not find anyone else?” OR something like, “So, do you guys get along?” A person who has a good experience with a Muslim officer/attendant comes home to relate it- “Though he was a Muslim, he was really nice to me. He helped me out today”. There is an innate assumption that they are not friendly and that you can’t get along with them - and those you can get along are exceptions. Another person says, “I have a Muslim friend. But he is very different though. He does not go to Mosque and all that. He is not a typical Muslim. He is very good.” The prevailing feeling is that devout and typical Muslims are somehow not easy to get along. On the other extreme are people who think that most of the evils of Indian society exist because of Muslims (very synonymous to how Nazis blamed certain sections of people for all evils of their society). They believe that Muslims should have gone to Pakistan during Partition- and they even blame Mahatma Gandhi and other founding fathers for allowing them to stay back in India. Most of them complain that our minorities are unnecessarily pandered and believe that excessive concessions are doled out to them.

Most moderate Hindus may not harbor much ill-will but they are fine as long as they see a Muslim as a grocer, a laborer, or auto-driver, but not in their regular life. Their attitude is more like – “Well, they exist, but not in our midst. Let’s keep it that way”. Just ask yourself, how many Muslims do you see in any of the top colleges or IT companies? Do they comprise 12-14% as our demographics suggest? (In my experience, most often they constitute less than 1%). How many of them are in your apartment complex? How many Muslim Prime Ministers has India seen? What is the percentage of Muslims in government jobs? Even If not in government jobs then how much Muslims do you see in Private Sector?

Those who hate Muslims find their voice and expression in some of the political and militant outfits- like VHP, RSS, Bajrang Dal, Shiv Sena and the BJP. Is it a coincidence that these groups comprise mostly upper caste leaders? Also, just look at the well-to-do NRI lobbies in US – most of them are anti-Muslim. (According to my experiences, around 90% of Indians living in US share negative sentiments towards Muslims.)

Most of this hatred is founded in the following: 

▪ Feeling of superiority (based on certain attributes of birth, legacy and history)

▪ Fear of other types of people – other religions and caste

▪ Lack of familiarity with other types of people, their culture, their mannerisms, their dress sense, language, family lifestyle, etc.

Most chaste Hindu communities forbid their kids mingling closely with Muslim kids. The Muslims go to different kind of schools and somehow are not part of the mainstream. It’s as if they are living in a different India altogether. The IT revolution which brought many Hindus to cities like Bangalore somehow seems to have completely skipped this community. The villages in Hindu also have distinct hierarchy towards these communities akin to the Indian caste system. The history also suggests that majority of the Muslims converted from lower castes in India.

What will it take for the Muslims to be readily accepted among us Indians? It has been more than 500 years Muslims have arrived in India. When people can easily accept Christians as fellow Indians the why not Muslims. I don't see similar kind of hatred for them. One more reason why I feel Muslims are hated is because they are Beef eaters. Well if we see the statistics then the amount of beef consumed by the U.S. or Europe or Australia is many folds that of the Indian Muslims. They will be shocked to know how brutally the cattle is killed is these parts of the world,Nobody complains there and moreover they portray us Muslims in such a way that we deliberately eat Beef just to hurt their feelings. Even after being together(if not actually) for so many centuries they fail to understand the  concept over which Islam is based and that is a single  Almighty we call ALLAH. For you Hindus its not difficult to add 1 more god to your already existing 3 crore gods(thats a change of 3.33 x 10^-6 %) as you guys believe in multiple gods but for us it simply isn't possible. And when we fail to do so you guys consider us to be intolerant and orthodox. One more reason is that you guys know so less about our culture and mannerism. Most Muslims will know about the complex rituals of Durga puja or a Hindu marriage but very few Hindu's know what we do during Eid or what happens during a Muslim marriage.

              Before you guys reach some conclusion here I must make it clear that I'm no Hindu hater or something like that. I believe India to be a model country to the world to showcase how more than 1.2 billion people from different religions, caste, language background, can co-exist and live in harmony. But although we are telling the world that this happens and boast of being the largest democracy in the world the actual ground scenario is much different. It is such hatred that creates terrorists and these terrorists create even more anti-muslim people. The process is cumulative.

               People should try to understand each others viewpoints and beliefs. Even if you don't support it at least don't disrespect it. For us muslims we are anti-idol worshipers but we don't run around demolishing mandirs and idols, not even in muslim dominant countries like Pakistan, Bangladesh, Singapore, Malaysia, Thailand. All I'm sayins is that if you guys don't love us at least don't hate us.
























If any one is hurt by this post ahk is sorry but remember it took a really hurt ahk to write this post.

West Bengal................whats in a name

As I woke up this other day and grabbed the morning news paper the first thing that I saw really pissed me off, I read The Times of India, an its been more than 7 to 8 years I've been doing so. Over the years the paper has fought on several issues and formed campaigns over various issues, I supported almost all of them but that morning what I saw made me hate the paper. A full front page campaing just to change the name of our beloved West Bengal. Their slogan,Only Bengal.
I mean what were these guys thinking? Are they just goin the Rupert Murdoch's way? Creating news just to sell the paper. Are they simply looking for oppurtunities to expand their reader base by doing these idiotic stunts. Next thing I know they were doing add's in the T.V. relating the same.
Is'nt there much important things to do right now other than changing the name of the state. The state is in seviour debt, there is problem with infrastucture, education, health care, and is facing a flood threat while these guys are busy disscussing why they should change the name of the state.
Before talking about removing the name West Bengal, we should first understand where it originated.The state of Bengal under colonial India comprised of the present day Bangladesh, West Bengal, Parts of Assam, Bihar, Jharkhand, and Orissa. The British thought that it was too large to handle and hence they decided to partion the province in two in 1905, West bengal, comprising present day Bihar, jharkhand, Orissa, West Bengal, Darjeeling and East Bengal comprising Dhaka, Chittagong, Assam, parts of Tripura etc. The partition of Bengal was one of the most important factors for the rise of nationalism and swadeshi movement in India. There were protests everywhere, students, politicians, poets freedom fighters all protested against it and the British were forced to annul the partition in 1911. Later in 1947 the partition of India followed and the rest is history.
The whole Idea of partition was to come together once broken into peices, Maulana Abul Kalam Azad said it was "Divorce before Marriage".Now even if East Bengal is now a different nation, Bengal is never complete unless we take into account both the bengal, now that East Bengal has changed their name to Bangladesh the paper feels there is a need to change the name of West Bengal also.Here are the reasons,
i.West Bengal is to the east of India;-well no one cares which part of India West Bengal lies, Its West Bengal and not west India, so as suggested by the name it is the western part of bengal.
ii.There is nothing as such West Bengali or Royal West Bengal tiger;-well when we talk about bengalis we have to consider all the bengali speaking people living here in West Bengal and in Bangladesh and although there is nothing as such West Bengali, there is a vast difference in the way the language is spoken in the two parts. Further the population of royal bengal tigers comprise the cats living in both the divisions.
iii.The west left us more than 60 yrs ago;-well this has got nothing to do with the british and them being in the west, its our name and our identity.
iv.No bay of west bengal, west bengal dish etc;-well the bay of bengal covers the coast line of both the bengal and we are fotunate its called bay of bengal giving us a unifying feel, although there is no different between the dishes but there certainly is a padma'r ilish and hoogly'r ilish, ilish, one of the defining characteristics of bengali.
v.Go up the alphabatical order;-While this may seem to be a reasonable reason at the same time we must remember in a democracy everyone has the same say even if you speak the last. And if this continues like this then say after 50 yrs all the states in india will have a silent A infront of their name.
Thus the only thing we can conclude is that either you unite both the bengals, if not politically, atleast in the hearts of the people living in them, and the concept of apar bangla and opar bangla is here to stay, By changing the name all the efforts that has been made over the years to bring them closer will go in vain and people of west bengal would forget that there exists an east bengal and there are bengalis apart from them who is as much passionate about our culture, traditions, history, pride. Or the other thing that you can do is remember that there are people having the same bengali heart just opar of the boundary. If great souls like Rabindranath Tagore, Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose, Swami Vivekananda had no problem calling this land West Bengal and fighting for uniting them, who are you? By this so called campaign of your's not only have you hurt the feelings of epar bengalis but also tried to neglect the opar bengalis birthright to call themselves Bengali but also have damaged the image of this great state of the nation of India, you guys need to be sued for tampering with the name of the state and stamping the word "only" over the word "west". Maybe tomorrow  you guys will try to change the name of East Bengal Football  Club. It is for the people of bengal to decide whether or not to change the name of the state. Have you lately seen any procession or rally by the people regarding this matter, remember the people of west bengal is not afraid to come out on the streets if the issue is worth fighting for. Your paper should immediately appologize and stop this drama.

wassup.....

Well well well….how have you guys been……..ahk is back……….I know, Iknow you guys missed me…….wondering where I have been??? Well the only thing that comes back after every six months to haunt a student…….exams man semester exams, kind of sick of them, thank god they are over,  So this is what you guys missed……….

                First off all……..my didi got married. Ya congrats didi.Then came exams and man how did I manage them.My didi got married on 8^th of May and the exams started on 19^th.So basically I studied for just  4 to 5 days for my exams. In other news I crashed my bike(yeah you all can yell “NOT AGAIN!!!!”) on 24^th, total cost of repairing, 15 grand, still havent got her, she is still in the service center waiting for the insurance to get cleared and in much bigger news I am now in 3^rd year, can you believe it guys, well even I cant, it seems as if it was just yesterday I started college…..you people might also be wondering why am I talking about myself since this blog is not about that, well I have written few stuff but I don’t find them quite upto the standard so I have kept them in hold, further I cant seem to find a good topic to write on, so guys help me out, give me a topic, and give some serious interesting ones, not the ones we used to get for english essay writing, all right just continue looking in this place, the real blog is coming up pretty soon……..coz

Today I don't feel like doing anything

I just wanna lay in my bed

Don't feel like picking up my phone, so leave a message at the tone

'Cause today I swear I'm not doing anything

Forgive yourself

Have you ever hurt someone and then you later wished that you never did that. That you never had that long conversation, and the whole point that you were trying to make is actually based on the horribly ridiculous ego that you have. It’s only when you end up with a huge mess that is when you realize that this is what you had feared the most. The whole picture of arguing with the other person flashes in your eyes like a flashback with all the effects and thunders and you feel like your brains are about to explode for working so much. You wait for that one opportunity to restart that conversation and hope this time you will end up on the winning side. But when you have already done that it’s only then that you realize that winning isn’t exactly what you need. Sometimes losing the battle, surrendering, subduing to your so called enemy is far better than seeing tears in your enemy’s eyes. Knowing that you are capable of accepting defeat which your enemy isn’t and there was a day that you loved your enemy more than how much you hate your friends now.

Your search for that one person has resulted in a disastrous calamity. The whole world seems to be so much full of maya and everything you look upon seems to be fake. The guitar that you played doesn’t quite seem to be in tune no matter how much you tune it, the bike that you ride lacks the adrenaline kick that it had, the sun gleaming down the tree’s lack the silver that it used to sprinkle the other day. The cool breeze seems to be poisonous, the water dangerous mercury. Food turns into ash in your mouth, money can no longer buy you happiness; women can no longer satisfy you.

You know you have your weaknesses; you know that you are exposed. You know that you are being tampered with; you know you are being betrayed. You know where the boundary ends but you keep pushing on. You question your own judgments, you wish you get through. Your gun is always backfiring, your knife is dull too. You wish you can show you true colors but you know they are dark and blue.

How do you rebuild the trust that you shared? How do you hide your darker twin? You may be happy to lose to someone you don’t know but how can you lose to the person residing inside you? Do you know how difficult it is to defeat yourself? The anger for the other person may go but how do you cool the anger for yourself?? You may sense the fear in the enemy’s eyes but can you hide your fear from yourself? You may forgive the other person but how do you forgive yourself?

How do you forgive yourself?




I understand that there are some problems

And I am not too blind to know

All the pain you kept inside you

Even though you might not show


If I can't apologize for being wrong

Then it?s just a shame on me

I?ll be the reason for your pain

And you can put the blame on me

RESPECT

I recently got a new sticker on the silencer pipe of my R15. It cries out loud “RESPECT”. To be honest with you all, the idea for it came from FIFA. Well most of us who follow football might have seen the word running around on the electronic advertisement boards. Now when the sticker guy asked what I would like to be written on the tail pipe I said RESPECT out of the inner attitude that I have. But apart from it I never gave a deep thought into what it actually represents or rather means until when this 1’st year girl in our college was tying her shoe laces with her foot on the letters. I really got pissed off and we had a long conversation on whether she was illiterate, blind or simply ignorant. But this small incident made me think. What is the thing that I want convey to the masses with this small word. Is it an Order, or a Request? Is it a statement, or a notice?

When you see the word RESPECT with nothing in front of it nor any thing in its rear how do you interpret it?

If given a thought then you must agree that RESPECT is a very important pillar that keeps the society running. Without respect the system will be so easily disrupted, all the sequence tampered, the rules broken, the order turned into chaos. But if seen closely then we’ll see that RESPECT has long evaded the hearts of the common man. The motorist doesn’t think twice before evading that traffic signal, the Romeo’s does not think twice before cheating on their Juliet’s. The politicians give a damn about it voters while pocketing all the cash, The musician pays no heed to any copyright violations before lifting that track, The policemen before taking the bribe, The government official before passing the pensioners file, The student before preparing chits for exams, The sportsman before taking a dope, The doctor before stealing the kidney, The engineer before ordering low grade cement, The champu before peeing on the roadside. RESPECT is missing everywhere, and the end result is chaos.

People who live under self build rules and ethic does not need a reminder for RESPECT of the universe and its small details. Why do other people have to impose rules and regulations on you when you can build them yourself, and the fun part being you can tweak it according to your needs. When you have RESPECT for every small thing around you only then you can be truly a complete man not just to the world but also to yourself. Respect, Honor, Dignity, make that your driving force and nothing can stop you. With these small changes you can always sing

Oh, this has gotta be the good life

This has gotta be the good life

This could really be a good life, good life

I say oh, got this feeling that you can't fight

Like the city is on fire tonight

This could really be a good life

A good, good life